Meditation, you’re doing it wrong!

That’s what I thought last year, when I made an attempt to sit still on my mat. It was supposed to help me with my depression. And it didn’t. What now? As I explained in a previous post, there is a difference between alone-less-ness and solitude. As my mind became more quiet with the help of medication and I’ve found some beginnings of stability in my mood, I tapped into my ‘Inner Quiet’.

I enjoy being alone! Not too much alone time is good for me, neither too little. It’s about hitting that sweet spot. And I thought to give meditation another chance. No, it actually found me as I like to read various articles on the net.

After my workout, I cleaned up the room and myself and sat down for five minutes. My posture was ok, nothing was hurting me or my heartbeat didn’t go through the roof. I wasn’t worried about how to hold my hands or if I was doing it right. I counted by breaths when my mind started to wonder about what the neighbors might be up too. (As a side note, I don’t know what my issue with neighbors is but it’s always something. It could be me though).

I let my eyes rest and followed my breathing. Sounds came and went through the open window and I felt the morning breeze on my face. And that’s it, there was nothing more or less about it.

I don’t care if I’m doing it wrong, if my posture is not 100% correct or that I shouldn’t count my breaths. I’m happy to found that stillness inside of me. It was gone for so many years and in those five minutes I made room for it. I invited it. I don’t know if it will come next time, but I’ll be sitting on my mat.

16 thoughts on “Meditation, you’re doing it wrong!

  1. Congratulations on reaching that peaceful stillness! That was what I discovered I could not find in the traditional meditation pose. For me, it’s easier to reach that state at a gentle walk or lying down, but I sometimes wish I could reach it in the seated posture. 🧎‍♀️

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Normally all of my body aches and it was just for 5 minutes too. I guess when I try to sit longer it will be uncomfortable too.
      It really depends on my state of mind and on all the messages that my body is sending me.
      I find it also easier to do after yoga or after a workout when the body is more relaxed.
      I think it’s normal for us in the West to have trouble sitting. A gentle walk, lying down, sitting in a chair or leaning against a wall are all good alternatives. There is not really a wright or wrong.

      Liked by 1 person

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