Celebrate good times, c’mon!

Hello blogging friends,

 

How are all 100 of you? Yes my blog has 100 followers, that is a lot of people. Just imagine 100 people standing in front of your window for example. You would think that for an uncertain lady like me that would be intimidating. But au contraire, mon ami, I love it. I feel like celebrating!

 

I started blogging last year in October. I wrote 2 very short posts in Dutch and left it at that. I had more fun building the blog itself,  choosing the colors, the theme and so on. The blog was there and collected virtual dust. Once a month I took a look, saw it was still there and was content to just see that. To write those two blogs was difficult because I was in such a turmoil from very active burnout. I couldn’t read nor write.

 

As the months passed I watched, very passively, a lot of YouTube. Mostly because I liked to ‘hear’ someone talking to me as I spend most of my time in solitude. I had an account on YouTube for years when I found out I could comment on videos. I thought it would be so pointless to share my thoughts but then there was this questionable character who felt the need to share ‘his wisdom’. He was very unlucky that he chose the mental health field. He made one comment in one video and I was lit, I was angry and on fire to let the world know that what he was saying was utter crap and bullshit. Excusez-moi my language!

 

People agreed with me in the comments but my point of view was lengthy and very specific. I was in need of a platform that would allow me to write more in depth on what I thought. I remembered my blog and started writing. (To be very honest, I wanted to make a video response to him but as my webcam is broken and I was too tired (burnout and depression) to walk to the store to buy one I started writing and I enjoyed it.)

 

A month further another thing happened. As I was still struggling with mental health but was really keen on getting myself in a better mind frame, I did what I do best: I thought about it. Normally I would talk about it too but my therapist was on holidays for three weeks. Meanwhile my psychiatrist referred me to that awful other therapist which I decided never to see again and I was left alone with ‘thoughts of progression to be made’ in my head. I remembered the blog and that is how it really began.

 

I wrote about depression and self-care and depression and loneliness and about depression and motivation. One day I suddenly reached 77 views. I still don’t know why. People started to follow my blog.  Others liked the posts, sometimes. I liked that. A post is successful in my eyes when it has 1 view and 1 like. Sometimes there were no likes and no views. I started doubting the post, it was clearly not good enough! When I leaned into myself, I knew it was what I wanted to say, I knew I was true to myself and I couldn’t delete the post either.

 

I started to get to ‘know’ people, other bloggers. I found that all people write about all strange stuff. I found that people here are not of the judgmental kind. Guess who needed that crowd? Me! As an only child (here we go again!) I thought that my story was so unique, which could be a good thing but all it did is to make me feel ‘odd’ and alone. Not in the blogging world, there are people who had the same experiences ‘same same but different’. Still enough for me to find my ground, to find my ‘ballast’.

 

In the beginning there we no comments, which can be a sad look for a post. I remember my first comment very well it was from JoAnn. She wrote: ’I hope that many more comments will follow’ and they did! I think JoAnn has some powers in the blogging-sphere! ‘How to be Cool‘ followed my blog and he likes my post frequently, when I’m in doubt somewhere in the evening I get a signal that somebody noticed it. It’s when you put your message in a bottle and it arrives at the other side of the world.

 

The second and the third comments were from Ashley. She comment(ed) so loyally on my posts. It really made the difference to power through with writing. There could not be a lot of room for self-doubt as someone, Ashley, ‘gets’ it and she doesn’t think my symptoms are weird or off. She also has such a popular blog but didn’t made me feel ‘as just a beginner’.

 

As I met V the world opened a bit more. Her post ‘Confessions of a Millenial’ and the comments there really freed me in a way. I was just so happy after reading. All the silly things that I was worried about, they weren’t logical at all. Ashley commented on my post about struggling with hygiene and depression and I was over the moon. Every little harsh comment I made about myself was not that important. I felt like running into the street and just scream at people; hey look at me, I’m weird and I don’t brush my teeth every day!

 

I made a deal with myself to be honest on my blog. I was being someone else everywhere else (except in my relationship, I value it too much) so I was going to try to ‘just be me’ on my blog and I would see how ‘me’ was going to be received. If I wanted to grow and to explore I couldn’t do it using a façade. There is honesty and there is Joshua. I can toot my own horn but to write so openly and respectfully as he does on his blog that is something else. His blog helped me to cross that line of being too careful.

 

Along came Caz who’s blog makes it easy for me to digest burnout and work related things. I never thought reading some else’s story could be so helpfull. And I didn’t even began to unravel and seriously read into Ursula’s blog which has some diamonds hidden I believe.

 

I met a stroke survivor who knows a great deal of Flanders and proves to me people are not the sum of their occupation or achievements in life. It is the small things I love to discover and read about people. Like that he loved cycling in Flanders.

 

I like reading ‘real’ blogs and I do find them. I find a true connection through the honesty and story of others. The blogs I read are touching and for a lack of a better word: ‘authentic’. For that I would like to say a true thank you!

 

As I meet people who touch me on all fronts of my life, I feel like I’ve been lifted up. I am able to rise above myself and that brings me joy and happiness. I feel like I’m healing the broken pieces.

 

I would like to thank you, all 100 of you, for reading, following and commenting.

 

The art of commenting, will be for another post as I have some learning to do on that one (hmm, being, hmmm too impulsive…) And for new followers to come, I thank you for joining me on this journey. I also need to thank Pierre who reads my blog every day although he knows all my ramblings. That is love and true dedication!

 

 

I send you virtual hugs and kisses because people need each other to rise up!

And now it’s time for a small party!

 

Michael Franti & Spearhead Lyrics

 

“Once A Day”
(feat. Sonna Rele)

…

 

Yo,
No no no no you never know what the world’s gonna show you,
It ain’t up to you.
You always think it’s gonna happen to another person,
And it’s never ever gonna happen to you.
You got your friends, you got your money,
Got your family, got your honey,
You think you got a million days.
But then life comes along
And it knocks you right down to the ground and that’s why I say,

Everybody oughta hug somebody, at least once a day.
And everybody oughta kiss somebody, at least once a day.
Everybody’s gonna miss somebody, at least once a day.
And everybody gotta love somebody, every day!

 

 

And we all will rise up! (Spread your wings and fly)
And we all will rise up!

I heard the purpose of life’s to live a life full of purpose,
And so don’t ever take for granted what the spirit has given you
In the first verse,
You might never get a second verse,
This ain’t a rehearsal, you can’t put it in reverse.
Believe in yourself, don’t let nobody be a negative or tell you what to do.
Cause I know (cause I know)
In this sweet, sweet life that just this much is true!

Everybody oughta hug somebody, at least once a day. (Once a day)
And everybody oughta kiss somebody, at least once a day. (Uh huh)
Everybody gonna miss somebody, at least once a day. (Yo, yo)
And everybody gotta love somebody, every day!

And we all will rise up! (Spread your wings and fly)
And we all will rise up!

So don’t you worry bout what people say,
Raise your head up and be on your way.
And it don’t matter if you fall today,
Just get up, get up, get up, get up!

We rise up! (Hey)
We rise up! (Hey)

…

And we all will rise up! (Rise up)
And we all will rise up! (Yeah)

…

Spread your wings and fly!